Everybody envies what the other has, says one mother. The working mom wishes she had more time to spend with her child; the stay-at-home mom wants to be recognized as a capable, creative person. Ben Baker Ann approached another mother at a school function recently and happily introduced herself.
The tension between moms who work and those who stay home is still smoldering a decade or so after the term "mommy war" was first coined, and even as the number of working mothers climbs. Acceptance As a Working Mom. Expecting a child? Learn the pros & cons of staying at home vs. going back to work after your little one is born. Find out what makes sense for you. STROLLER STRIFE: Everybody envies what the other has, says one mother. The working mom wishes she had more time to spend with her child; the stay-at-home mom wants to .
Tweet In the winding path my career has taken, I have spent substantial time both in and out of the workplace since my children were born. So instead of taking a side I'm going to do this. Here I offer seven non-negotiable truths I've revealed from my time moving across the battle lines when it comes to working moms versus stay at home moms.
All working moms "have" to work. This is non-negotiable, even though I admit I am SO guilty of putting up this defense mechanism. Some people work to pay the electric bill, some people work to afford private school, some people work in an effort to break glass ceilings and kill the patriarch, some people work to preserve their sanity.
But telling a working mother she doesn't really "have" to work is the most offensive thing you can possibly say. I'm guilty of it, but since I've gotten it thrown in my face -- never again. It's simply not true. If they didn't feel they had to work they would be spending their time at museums or the mall with or maybe without their kids.
No one gets up each day and goes to work without a sense of duty. Don't rob them of it just for this silly working moms versus stay at home moms debate.
All working parents make sacrifices as well, but that seems to be a given. Especially in today's economy, no one can afford to sideline an income without important sacrifices. Even if they have enough to make ends meet, they worry more about their spouse losing their job, they worry about future costs and how they keep growing.
Even if they have all the money in the world, they are still sacrificing time and energy that could be put towards a job or charity or leisure.
And unless they popped out babies before ever having to enter the working world, they are sacrificing part of their identity that existed in their career. What they do all day is vital to their new identity and it doesn't deserve to be trashed.
We are all trying to do the best for our kids. With others it means going to work to provide their children with more than the basic necessities of life. Everyone is thinking and making choices. There should be respect for that process, even if the outcome is different from what you believe in.
We have the right to change our mind. When my son was born I thought it was most important to be home with him. I was raised by a waitress and a cab driver - they took their shifts in a way that meant one of them was always home with me and my brother.
To me, that is what parenthood looked like, so I thought that was what I should do -- always be home for him.
When my daughter was born I started to think about the example I was setting for her. I wanted her to have the choice to have kids or not, to go to work or not, but I felt compelled to show her a working mom's life. We also have the right to redefine our work.
It's not being contradictory to change your mind, it's called growing. What we have in common has little to do with how we spend our days.Some stay-at-home moms feel their babies are clingier than those of working moms.
There's no question that your child will be relying on you and you alone -- a habit that can be hard to kick.
Adjusting to preschool is sometimes challenging for such kids. Working Mothers 3 The topic this researcher chose was Working vs.
Stay at Home Mothers: The Impact on Children. Statement of Problem According to this researcher not much has been done in the area of the impact of a. The decision to stay at home or work will be one of the most difficult decisions a mother will make.
Most women would testify that being a stay at home mother has both its benefits, and its downfalls. As a mom who has been both a working mom and a stay at home mom, there is no winner.
Working Moms Versus Stay At Home Moms: 7 Non-Negoitable Truths. As a mom who has been both a working mom .
In reality, the ‘mounting evidence’ about working vs. stay-at-home moms is mixed. But the study at the center of Miller’s piece makes a much more disturbing claim: that stay . Married stay-at-home mothers with working husbands are nearly twice as likely to be foreign born as their working counterparts (38% vs.
20% in ), a larger gap than is true for other types of stay-at-home mothers compared with their working counterparts.